First Day (May 28).

Moon:  Waning Gibbous

Flow/Texture:  Free flow

Mood:  excellent

Symptoms:  tiny cramps

Mucus:

Twenty-five day cycle.  Yes!

I’ve felt great all day.  I binged on the Bhagavad-Gita, found a site with a slightly different translation and notes, so I ended up reading the 5th, 7th, and 8th teachings about three times more each–I think I got ‘em now.

I was looking forward to the full moon ritual and was not expecting my period, but lo and behold, she comes.  I knew I had to do it then, no matter what.  Thing is, about an hour or so before, I couldn’t see the moon and was bummed absolutely, thinking I’d have to do it sans lunar inspiration.

After a little more reading, I began preparing my ritual paraphernalia outside.  As I went back in to retrieve more stuff, I looked up and saw it–a beautiful, bright waning gibbous–though it was enough (98% ) of a full moon for my needs.

The setup was simple and good:  three candles, some rosemary oil in a burner, green tea, and my list.  And the ritual went well:  I invoked the presence of the divine, spoke my piece, destroyed the list, thanked the divine, then meditated while looking up at the moon.  I even offered a libation.

I sat on a red cloth and bled onto it as I meditated.  I was in the moment, so no stream this time, only the image of my blood flowing from me as the moon washed me in its light.  This is the a typical first day–pretty light, so I’m just seeping a bit.

Rosemary oil is lovely.  As the breeze blew, it mixed with the vanilla scent of the pillar candle almost like a drug.  Somehow, as I spoke the words, I felt that I was accomplishing something.  I still do.

Except for a little tummy growling and the tempting smell of red meat, the fast was perfect.  I’m still going strong.  I’d like to meditate a while tomorrow before eating, maybe practice some breathing exercises for the upcoming cramps instead of applying the good touch.  Ya know, just for some mind over matter practice.

A great way to end the night:  writing in my journal and reading some excerpts from the Bhagavata Purana–yet again.

Before Period–Day 25.

Moon:  Full Moon

Flow/Texture:

Mood:  energetic

Symptoms:  cravings

Mucus:  white balls, stronger scent/taste, wet newspaper texture

I’m weirded out by the lack of symptoms, especially while I’m so close.  My workout routine’s been consistent and I’m taking my vitamins, but still.

With the full moon, I had plans for a ritual, but that didn’t pan out.  I doubt that I’ll even mediate.  I was thrown off the vibe.  People.  Pfft.  I’ve heard, however, that the window  is open for at least a day or so after.  I’ll try again tomorrow night.

The 7th teaching has given me some things on which to meditate.  There was more on unity.

Oh, my seeds are sprouting–just in time.  I’m thrilled.  Seems they like the sun more than I assumed.

I’ll embark on another water fast tomorrow and read as much as possible and meditate on womanhood.  Perhaps I’ll think about Oshun for a bit.

Before Period–Day 24.

Moon:  Waning Gibbous

Flow/Texture:

Mood: calm

Symptoms:  headache

Mucus:  stingy cervix, white, creamy, normal taste/scent

I enjoyed the first day of the fast because I was allowed to focus on my tasks instead of what I was putting in my belly throughout the day.  I felt empty, light, and motivated.  With that in mind, I’d like to try it perhaps once a week.

While sleeping, I actually dreamed, which is rare for me, though I’m almost always guaranteed at least one dream during PMS.  In the dream, I’m walking through a familiar neighborhood.  I’m on my way to my grandmother’s house when I see a big, malicious looking dog.  The trip to Grammie’s house is postponed.

I turn go home and see policemen dragging some handcuffed kids to the police station–there are no police station’s in the actual neighborhood.  I walk passed, fearing one of the kids getting away even though the police woman dragging him is awesomely buff and tough-looking.

Two more kids come through a door that magically appears on the sidewalk and suddenly I’m in a tiny room with these kids and a bunch of other people.  There’s a movie on:  some kid tells an older woman that she’s pretty hot without realizing that she’s his great-grandmother.  Red face ensues.  One of the kids, who looks like a blond version of the Stay-Puft Marshmallow Man, walks passed me.

For some reason, the kid brings out a special kind of violent rage in me.  I tell my sister how much I want to repeatedly punch him in the face. Yet, because he’s made of an impenetrable rubber which would bounce me back against the wall possibly breaking every bone in my body, I know it’s useless.

Automatically, I interpreted the dream as a symbol of impotent rage.  I have to laugh when I consider the sources for some of those dream images.  Even my interpretation comes the Bhagavad-Gita:  In the beginning, Arjuna refuses to fight and so, feeling dejected, he slumps down in his chariot.  Thus, he’s no longer standing erect.  Krishna calls this impotence.

In other news, I’ve finally admitted to myself that negative imagery and ideas harsh my mellow.  The day I was feeling sad and vulnerable was the day I saturated myself in the stuff.  Before the spiritual kick, this was a normal occurrence.  Now, on the days I limit myself to my books, meditation, and information gathering, I’m calm and much more susceptible to positive influences.

Common sense, I’m sure, but I hadn’t realized just how badly my typical time wasters affected me.  I took a peek at one and immediately felt drained and saddened.  I tried ignoring it, but it kept bashing me in the head, intruding on my good thoughts.  Jeepers.

Before Period–Day 19.

Moon:  Waxing Gibbous

Flow/Texture:

Mood:  serene

Symptoms:  bloating, cravings, horn (with accompanying dreams)

Mucus:  white, greasy/smooth texture, normal scent, tasteless

I was a ravenous thing this morning.  I ate something, watched some Law & Order and suddenly felt calm, ready to work, fast, and read.

I’m starting the water fast at the end of the week, at which time I will mediate, drink my water, and read.  I’m not sure how this will affect my workout routine, but I just feel that it’s time–perhaps I might do yoga.  This is a feeling, this calmness, serenity, and surety, that I’ve rarely felt so I’m going with it.  I’ll do whatever it wants and go wherever it leads.

I read half of the Book of Daniel and took some notes before going to sleep.

The wandering eye has seized me:  other cups are striking my fancy.  I blame my Diva Cup’s perpetually stained, hollow stem and the sealing holes that are annoying to clean.

I’m looking at the Yuuki and Lunette especially.  The Yuuki [youtube video] is really cute and has a solid stem.  I like the Lunette’s [youtube video] minimalist design and flat, solid stem.  According to the video, apparently the Yuuki cup has either a hollow or solid stem.  Damn.

While visiting the yOni menstrual tips board again, I found a few that captured my eye:

H o o o w l
at the moon

Wear red.
It stimulates the circulation and replaces the red you are losing from the aura.

Spend time by the ocean. Use the beauty and power of nature, especially water, to cleanse, clarify and wash away the old and no longer useful thoughts and feelings. Long, hot, perfumed soaks in the bath are great. Clary Sage and Rose oils are lovely.

All things grow with water. Release your tears and fear not the murky depths of your unconscious. Use your menstrual time to bring the mind home and contact your true nature.

Be
selective
about how
and who
you spend
your time
with

Have a day off.
~~~
I’ve found this to be my best medicine. Meditate, dance wildly, be creative, have orgasms, watch the moon, sleep more, read, do nothing, do whatever turns you on.

Gather a group of women together, the more diverse the group the better. Tell them in advance that you’ll be getting together to talk about your moon time. Have everyone bring food. Make herbal tea. Share stories about your menses and what it has meant to you. It’s so empowering to be able to share these stories with other women.

Try not wearing pads or tampons. Just let your blood flow, fill all of your folds and run down you legs. Obviously, the price of laundry detergent means you can’t do this too often, but it’s incredible – the warmth, that heady smell, being bathed in your own lubrication…this is womanhood!

Fasting.

Found some informative tips on water fasting.  I’ve considered fasting for a good while, maybe over the last few years.

The starving the body while feeding the spirit principle appeals to me most.  I’d love experience some type of enlightenment or spiritual revelation following this.  In fact, I’m looking forward to it–focusing on my head and heart rather than my belly.

I’m also turned on by the cleansing/detox aspect which  I believe couples nicely with the menstrual cycle.

Along with mediation and reading, an important part of the fast will be my journal.  I must remember to write down everything extraordinary, whether it occurs to my body or in my mind.  Emotions will hold a great significance as well.

I’ve considered a few types of fasts, but eventually settled on the water fast.  More specifically, I will attempt a three-day version of the 24-hour fast found here.

Random quote:

Water fasting is a physical powerhouse that can nuke debris from your system and give you an outlook on life you never thought possible. It is, in some ways, supernatural. Yet it is the toughest of all types of fasting because you receive no taste or substance in your body for the allotted time - except for the water itself.

Essentially, it’s drinking water throughout the day to curb hunger along with green tea for energy.  A week before the fast, I’m to consume vegetables, fruits, poultry, and fish along with lots f water.  This is said to aid in the detoxing process.

Ideally, I will meditate and do yoga in the morning and read while taking notes on both the texts and any symptoms I experience.  Meditation and yoga again in the night hours seems appropriate as well.

It’s been several days since I’ve experienced the good touch.  Looks like I unintentionally started a form of fasting without even trying.

It’s a nice day–a good day for reading and potting my seeds.